Ever Want to go Rogue?

Now, I’m only slightly referencing Star Wars, well because I enjoy the sci fi saga. But seriously, do you ever think about doing it? About just breaking all of the rules that have kept you suppressed for so long. Does your body crave it? 

Or is it just me? 

I’m not afraid to admit it. I’ve been thinking about it multiple times! Have I ever done it in the capacity that I want to? No. I’m much too much of a rule follower and I’m sure most of you are as well (thank you Type A personality). I am also committed to my clients and am there for them. Just as we all are for those we love and/or are important to us, such as our families, friends, co-workers, and those we treat. We cannot and will not abandon them. 

And I’m not asking you to. What I’m saying is, have you ever thought about just doing things the way you want? If there were no consequences, social/physical/monetary. Let me give a few examples to show what I mean. When I think about going rogue I think about just taking a random day off to lay around the house, go to a beach or a pool, or to read in my comfy chair. Or booking a last minute vacation to a luxurious resort. I think about taking my students outside for therapy and doing super fun activities, like having a petting zoo, playing with water balloons, or creating a big garden! Those break so many rules, but it would be so much fun for the children and staff (who wouldn’t want to pet a baby goat?!). I also think about not doing paperwork, or billing, or worrying about following a schedule! 

Going rogue can have many different pictures, each person has their own colors they’re working with. Different things we’re going through, different people we have to put up with (you all have at least one), and different needs to meet. It’s ok to let your imagination run wild! Let it out. It feels good! And it may lead to a realistic idea. When I first thought about going rogue I made a list of the things I wanted to do. I downed some of them a bit and created a day in my week where I do whatever it is I want to do. And let me tell you, it feels amazing! I look forward to it every week. I make sure to get work done before, so I’m not stressed about it or feeling guilty. Spoiler Alert: this will be a future blog post, but I also decided what tasks are truly necessary and I get the, what I like to call, fluff out. Fluff is that extra stuff that keeps us busy but doesn’t actually amount to anything or move the needle in any way, shape, or form. It also left me feeling like I wasted my time. And I HATE wasting time. Again, as I’m sure some of you do. Also, again that will be a future blog post, so be on the lookout! 

I read once in a book (I’m not sure which because I read so much!), that if you think about something often, your body is trying to tell you something. For example, if I’m really feelin like laying on a beach, cocktail in hand, with the sun on my skin, and reading a good book, then it probably means my body needs relaxation and rest. Unfortunately, I don’t have the luxury to just not go into work suddenly and take a private jet to Hawaii. So, what’s a girl to do? Well, if I’m lucky and the sun is out, I lay on my yoga mat on my front porch. Sometimes I add a nice touch of  meditation music off of my phone. I usually do that when I really need to fully relax. You’ll be amazed how 20 minutes of sunlight can make you feel more relaxed and better throughout the rest of your day. I always remember when I’m doing it! But somehow forget when I’m set into my routines. 

Wanting to go rogue is not a bad thing. So, don’t you dare feel bad. It doesn’t mean you're lazy, or being too selfish, or being stupid. It means you need a break! I’m going to hit you with some real talk for a sec. I’m going to be very honest with you all, to the point you may negatively judge me. I know when I’m feeling burned out, because I feel pissed off about having to literally do anything related to work. Paperwork, billing, talking to people, and treatings kids. When my battery is drained and I can feel my cells burning, that’s when I know I need a day. I’m also going to be honest, I know when I’m at that level, I need much more than just a day. However, as this post is about, we can’t just not go into work for a week at the last minute, even if we really want to or need it. So, how to deal with these feelings? Feelings of irritation, exhaustion (both mental and physical), feeling underappreciated, and (let’s be real) probably hungry too. How many times have you worked through lunch and didn’t make time for breakfast? All of these things deplete our already low battery and you can only keep pushing yourself for so long. Trust me, I’ve been there. Multiple times. And it doesn’t get better, it feels harder to put your body through that. 

How to deal with the feels: 

When feeling these negative emotions, listen to them! Don’t immediately dismiss them. That will (at least for me) get you nowhere. Our body will make us listen if we keep choosing not to. It can only take so much stress. This is how I have learned to deal with the feels: 

1. Journal: Write them out! Also, thinking about them in third person shrinks them. Sometimes our emotions run wild, even if it’s something that doesn’t correlate to a huge reaction. Dig deep. Analyze the why. I like to ask myself “why?” repeatedly to figure out my true feelings or the true cause of why something is bothering me. You’ll be amazed at what pops into your head! 

2. Take a bath: No, not because you stink. Because it feels so relaxing to sit in warm/hot water and let your body relax. I’ve written about this one in SLP Self Care (https://www.rtsohio.com/post/ssc-slp-self-care). Listening to meditation music also adds a nice touch. 

3. Write a list of fun things you like to do: I actually got this idea from a book about how to  have fun. It really hits you that you’ve let work take over when you feel you’ve forgotten how to have fun. Also, make sure to do these things!! 

4. Write a list of things that relax you: Read above :) 

5. Identify your boundaries and set them: If you’re feeling this bad about what you’re going through with work, and if you’re able to control it (which you are) then this is probably the second thing to try, after journaling. Here’s why: You will realize the true reasons for feeling burned out and you can think of boundaries to set to help fix it. For example, I realized I felt burned out when I didn't have enough down time. I realized this, because I would be especially cranky when it would be time to go to bed and I only got 1 hour of time with my boo to watch TV and relax. Now, I stop working at 6 PM, to make sure I get at least 3 hours of downtime before bedtime. 

I really hope these ideas help! Some of them take some work, which I know is why you’re feeling like this in the first place. However, this is personal development work. This is the underground work that needs to get done, so the vase (you) can stop shaking and feeling unstable. I recently read somewhere that we dictate our habits and our habits dictate our life. So true, but easy to overlook at the same time. Start little by little to change yours. 

Remember we are strong! 

• Ashton